


Emotional scars

by xXxMidnight_WolfxXx



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: 2 for each chapter, Angst, Apathetic Logan, Constructive Critism welcome, First multi-chapter fanfic, Logan-centric, Other, Poems are kind of relevant, a little ooc, can you guess who’s saying them?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-08 00:35:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16419074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXxMidnight_WolfxXx/pseuds/xXxMidnight_WolfxXx
Summary: The different sides of Thomas work in mysterious ways, they can be summoned by Thomas at will, interact with each other, and shapeshift. They can do many wonderful things but can they change their purpose?Can a positive and light side, turn into a dark side over time?





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

> I found something today...  
> It’s called a butterfly  
> Its wings are really pretty  
> They’re orange with black lines
> 
> I took some notes on it in my journal  
> I take notes on everything  
> I want to remember everything I learned  
> Even if it’s kind of dumb
> 
> They called me a nerd  
> I don’t know if it was in a nice way  
> I don’t think they were trying to be mean  
> But they were
> 
> I shouldn’t tell them that...

Curiosity was the first side to form, Thomas as a baby had no distinctive personality yet but he was naturally curious. Every young child is at least a little curious about how everything in the world works. There were no other sides to accompany Curiosity until after Thomas turned 3, and could understand right and wrong, when Morality formed.

The curious side took the form of a six year old Thomas, he wore khaki shorts with a dark blue button-up which was obviously three sizes to big. The sleeves went five inches past his hands and the shirt nearly covered his shorts. He always held a notebook in which he wrote down the answer to questions he wondered about.

Curiosity didn’t need to wear glasses as he had 20/20 vision just like Thomas, however he thought they made him look intelligent. His glasses were the ones with the large circles for the frame instead of smaller rectangles.

One more fact about Curiosity’s appearance were his eyes, they weren’t Thomas’s natural dark brown, instead they had the appearance of a galaxy full of stars reflecting the side’s love of space, his pupils were moons that changed from crescents to full depending on the actual moon.

For the few years that he lived in Thomas’ mindscape alone he convinced the small child he was apart of to do many things in order to satisfy his Curiosity. Somethings ended in Thomas’s parents fretting over the baby, like when Curiosity got Thomas to try and lick the outlet, or when Thomas had almost fallen off of a counter.

Curiosity took down all of these notes with immense glee, he loved learning about new things and new places, and he had complete freedom to do whatever he liked. Well he did until Morality, Thomas’s sense of right and wrong, had finally formed.

When Curiosity had first been notified about Morality’s existence, simply by the two doors, which are almost exact copies of the sides eyes, leading to the sides individual rooms. He had initially wanted to meet the new side immediately, until he remembered Thomas’s parents warning about strangers. He was conflicted with the decision of confronting this new side, or simply avoiding him. In the end Curiosity couldn’t resist his nature and confronted this new side. Morality turned out to be very kind and loving thankfully, Curiosity took down many notes about him.

Morality was a very eccentric side who loved puns and physical contact with whoever was closest, which for two years was Curiosity. He wore attire similar to Curiosity but not an exact copy.

Morality also took the form of a six year old Thomas, he wore khaki shorts with a pink collared shirt tucked into his shorts. He had rainbow suspenders and a light blue cape to top it off. Morality tripped over his cape many times but he loved it nonetheless. He didn’t wear glasses because he just didn’t see any use for them. Morality’s eyes, unlike Thomas’s dark brown ones, looked like the sky during a semi-cloudy day, his pupils looked like twin suns.

When Morality formed two different rooms formed, one for Curiosity and one for Morality. Before Morality was an official side Curiosity just lived in the mindscape alone, there were no rooms because they just weren’t needed. Morality’s room had a warm aura to it, it was filled to the brim with sentimental objects from Thomas’s life. Often times when Curiosity would go into the room he wouldn’t come out for hours, which is why Curiosity doesn’t visit Morality’s room often, he would rather use his time else where.

Curiosity’s room wasn’t really a room, when you opened the door you were greeted with a small field that had a hill located in the center. If you were to climb the hill you would see a tree with a small wooden house built into it. Inside the small house was Curiosity’s room, with a bed, nightstand, and a bookshelf. The house had an added on balcony which a telescope was located, Curiosity used it to watch the sky which changed from night to day whenever he wished. Morality would often watch the clouds drift by or look at constellations with Curiosity through the entire day.

As much as Curiosity loved to have another side around, Morality...the kind side stopped Curiosity from doing many of things he used to. Morality wouldn’t let Curiosity learn what would happen if he did things that were more on the dangerous side. Unsurprisingly Curiosity wasn’t satisfied with how little his purpose was being used, surprisingly he was completely okay with that. Sooner or later he would’ve been forced to realize that he couldn’t keep putting Thomas into these dangerous situations.

The two sides worked well together and were glad they got to be friends with each other for the rest of Thomas’s life. Then Creativity and Deceit were created, the third light side and the first dark side. In this point in time however the sides didn’t know the difference between light and dark sides, they just thought that all sides were just that, sides! 

Deceit was manifested a little while before Creativity, a five year old Thomas had accidentally knocked over his Aunt Patty’s favorite vase instead of telling the truth he lied and blamed it on the dog. Right at that moment was when Deceit formed, the other two hadn’t been alerted of his presence until he was right next to them.

Deceit, just like the rest of the sides, took the form of a six year old Thomas. He wore a black trench coat with a purple t-shirt underneath, for pants he wore black jeans held up with belt. He had on a black baseball cap that had a white ribbon around it.The dark side’s right eye resembled Thomas’s, his left eye however resembled that of a snake matching the small patch of scales on his face. Surrounding his right eye was a light purple circle that would get darker over time, but right now you could hardly even see it.

None of the light sides had been able to see his room, because it was in a different part of the mindscape where the light sides were not allowed, according to Curiosity. The curious side had been to the dark side of the mindscape, before Morality formed, and it was horrifying to the young side, it was pitch black and he could’ve sworn he heard screaming in the distance. It haunted Curiosity for a few months until he eventually managed to cast the thought of it away.

Deceit always spoke in lies Curiosity would know, he took notes on all of the other sides, it was easy to figure out what he was actually trying to tell you. Once Curiosity asked him why he always spoke in lies, the deceitful side replied that “It’s not more fun that way”, Curiosity put that into his notes about Deceit.

Then a few days after Deceit formed Creativity did, it was the second week of pre-K and the Teacher wanted each of the student to draw something good they learned in school. Thomas drew, or well tried to draw, an animal because the day before the class was learning the different sounds that the animals make.

This was the moment when Creativity formed, he was an over-the-top and quite energetic side. He always seemed to be coming up with idea one after the other. He often times convinced the other sides to put on little shows for Thomas when he was daydreaming.

Creativity’s wardrobe was the simplest of all the sides, firstly he as same as all the other sides manifested in the image of a six year old Thomas. He wore a long sleeve white button-up, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, which fit him a tad loose. He wore jeans which were torn at the knee, and many different bracelets which all had an idea they had come up with recently. Creativity also wore a flower crown which colors changed with the emotion he was feeling. His eyes looked like they had a small fire at the bottom that was constantly burning as much as Creativity’s passion, it only went out when Creativity couldn’t come up with any idea’s.

Creativity’s room was always changing, one day it could be a kingdom and the next it’s an ocean. All of it really depended on Creativity’s, or Thomas’s, imagination. Sometimes Creativity would drag the other sides, excluding Deciet, on an adventure that he worked on. Creativity just felt unnerved by the very presence of Deceit, like something wasn’t quite right with the lying side.

After being excluded by Creativity for so long Deceit stopped visiting the light sides, when Thomas got to first grade, or at least that’s what they all assumed happened. It could’ve been that more dark sides were forming, or that Deceit just was getting tired of the positive energy that seemed to surround the other sides. Curiosity personally thought that it was because Deceit just didn’t like them anymore, it wasn’t a particularly happy explanation, but it was an explanation nonetheless. 

Morality wouldn’t let Deceit’s sudden disappearance bother him, even though everyone could tell it did cross his mind more than a few times. The kind side found comfort in his favorite things that begin with “C” cookies, Curiosity, and Creativity. Morality was back to being the pun-loving side he was before, sure he missed Deceit a tad, but he knew the future was brighter than the sun.

However everyone must go through hardships in life, there in no clear pathway. Just a rocky road full of surprises, both good and bad. There are highs and lows in the future, some highs make you feel completely invincible, while the lows make you feel like you’re taking your last breath. There is no avoiding this ups and downs and if you try all you may end up with is a broken heart.

What challenges will these young sides face in the vast future and will they be able overcome them easily, or will they drown in these problems with no chance of escape, breathing their last breath?


	2. New Friends, New Sides

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isn’t Disney for girls?  
> Are you a girl?
> 
> Enjoy the chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t like him  
> He’s really mean  
> He’s going to hurt us  
> We need to stop them
> 
> I’m just trying to protect them  
> Protect us  
> We don’t need anymore of us  
> I can tell that another is forming 
> 
> Slowly will  
> We need to cut ties  
> And soon

Thomas was in a good mood today, his mother had washed clothes recently so he got to wear his Mickey Mouse shirt, which was his favorite. The day before he got brand new shoes, the ones that light up, and a new water-bottle in favorite color, pink! He got his favorite food for breakfast, and all of his friends at school gave him a hug, how could he not be in a good mood!?

At this moment Thomas was in his fourth grade classroom settling in, as he had just arrived. While the boy settled into his seat, unpacking items from his bag such as glitter pencils and decorated notebooks, he noticed that the seat next to him was occupied by another boy. The odd thing about this prospect was the fact that for the first three months that school had been going on for that chair was empty, the class didn’t have enough students to fill every seat.

The boy had blond hair with the tips tainted black, his parents must have let him dye it. He had on a dark blue jacket on just like Thomas, it was getting a tad colder. His shirt was a light shade of green that said “I’d flex, but I like this shirt”, Thomas snickered at that. The most intriguing thing about this boy were his eyes, which were both different colors. His left eye was a light blue, and his right eye was a dark brown. Thomas remembers learning about that from his mother, it’s called heterochromia he believes.

“Who’s that boy” Curiosity asked his fellow sides, his eyes confused.

“I don’t know.. we should ask him!” Creativity said in response to Curiosity’s question.

“That seems like a nice thing to do, he’s probably new!” Morality added in “He might not have any friends yet”

Thomas by no means was lonely, at school many kids were pulled into his naturally eccentric, personality. That doesn’t mean that Thomas wouldn’t like to have more friends though, so the sides proceeded to prompt Thomas to introduce himself to the new student.

“Hey what’s your name? I’m Thomas” Thomas held out his hand to the boy, who turned out to have a stutter.

“Umm m-my name is Jake” The boy shook Thomas’s outstretched hand and softly smiled. 

“Do you like Disney!” Thomas asked excitedly trying to find something that the two could talk about.

“Umm no, m-my dad says it’s f-for girls” Jake said having an obvious distaste for the company.

Thomas seemed okay with his answer, inside of his mindscape was a completely different thing. Morality and Creativity were running around confused as to why someone could ever hate the amazing company that is Disney. Curiosity was hurriedly looking through his notes to find a reason for why Jake didn’t like Disney, he couldn’t find any since his notes on the subject were a tad bias. 

“Ask him why Thomas!” Curiosity yelled a pencil in hand, prepared to write down the response.

“Why don’t you like it?” Thomas asked, listening to the curios side’s advice. 

“Well it’s to girly, all of those p-princesses” Jake responded voicing his opinion.

“There aren’t only princess movies” Thomas stated confusion lacing his expression.

“S-still Disney is kind of stupid in general” It was at this moment that Jake noticed the Mickey Mouse shirt that Thomas was currently wearing. It was the fourth grader’s favorite shirt to wear, he wore it whenever he could.

“You l-like Disney?” Jake asked in a slightly disgusted tone “Are you a g-girl?” 

Thomas quickly covered his shirt with the jacket he had on over, stammering from the embarrassment.

“N-no of course not, my mom made me wear th-this” Not wanting to embarrass himself in front of a potential friend Thomas lied, much to the dismay of the light sides. 

“You even h-have a pink water b-bottle, are y-you sure you a-aren’t a-a girl?” 

“No! I’m not, I accidentally grabbed the wrong water bottle when I left home!” Thomas wasn’t sure why he felt the need to prove himself to the new kid, he just needed to.

“O-okay I guess” Jake went back to messing with jacket sleeve bored out of his mind.

Thomas didn’t know how to keep the conversation going so he just stared at his glitter pencils and sticker filled notebooks in slight shame. He started too overthink, which wasn’t ever really a good thing since anxiety became an official side in first grade. Did people think he was to, well feminine? Thomas was well aware he wasn’t exactly masculine for his age, he sometimes preferred to do activities or to have things that were considered “girly” by society.

Did people think he was weird for being the way he was, for his preferences? Did they just not mention anything in fear of hurting nine-year-old’s feelings? There are to many questions that are clouding Thomas’s mind and confusing the poor kid. 

“Ow...” Curiosity mumbled in pain rubbing his eyes, he didn’t enjoy when Thomas had these downward spirals of negative emotions for more than one reason. The obvious reason he didn’t enjoy these moments was because sadness wasn’t exactly an emotion Thomas enjoyed. The other reason was because whenever Thomas felt strong negative emotions Curiosity felt a slight discomfort, or well pain. 

Curiosity used the to look at Morality when this happened since he essentially is the embodiment of Thomas’s emotions. However Morality stated, or at least claimed, that he was not responsible for these negative thoughts clouding Thomas’s mind. 

“Okay class settle down” Luckily Thomas’s less than positive thought process, and Curiosity’s slight eye-aches, stoped when the teacher spoke. Thomas’s attention went to the lesson that they were learning that day and the sides’s attention went to Curiosity.

“Are you feeling okay?” They asked having heard Curiosity’s grumble of pain.

“I’m... just fine” Curiosity responded not wanting to worry his fellow light sides, if they were worried Thomas wouldn’t be as productive as he usually was. Curiosity knows that they mean well but they can be a bit overbearing.

“Let’s just focus on school” Curiosity started to take notes, along with Thomas.

“And the new kid!” Morality added excitedly

“Our friendship is a great possibility” Creativity yelled just as excited. 

The sides’s optimism cheered up Thomas and a faint smile made its way onto his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why don’t they like him?  
> I know he’s kind.  
> I know he’ll fix us.  
> He will stop if they tell him
> 
> They want another one of us  
> He won’t form if you stop  
> They need to keep being friends  
> I’d love to be responsible for this

**Author's Note:**

> Where am I?  
> It’s so dark here  
> I can barely see  
> Something is on my back
> 
> I’m scared  
> What if they’re monsters?  
> Or maybe spiders!  
> I wanna go home..
> 
> But where is home...  
> Is this home?  
> I wanna leave  
> I need help
> 
> Someone’s here-


End file.
